I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Buhtt sex?
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Randomize
