Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
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I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
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My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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