dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
