so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Randomize
