I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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