You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Randomize
