I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Randomize
