He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
