I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
