I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Randomize
