Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
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