I love black thongs
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
