the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
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