The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I need to calm my uterus...
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize
