if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Are these your boobs on my camera?
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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