i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize