hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
We don't watch enough power rangers
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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