He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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