Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(586): View more from Michigan

Go study a dick amy that's outrageous

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(586): Go study a dick amy that's outrageous http://tfl.nu/yka3

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(231): View more from Michigan

Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.

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(231): Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life. http://tfl.nu/gt3a

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(480): View more from Arizona

is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.

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(480): is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state. http://tfl.nu/3rqa

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(214): View more from Texas

new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.

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(214): new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5. http://tfl.nu/1dnu

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf

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(262): I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf http://tfl.nu/oxnj

Replies (22) Good night (7215) Bad night (1548)
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(810): View more from Michigan

woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.

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(810): woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag. http://tfl.nu/ubfv

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(314): View more from Missouri

You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time

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(314): You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time http://tfl.nu/thrg

Replies (17) Good night (2048) Bad night (2940) Order T-Shirt
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.

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(+44): I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa. http://tfl.nu/wm5o

Replies (3) Good night (2012) Bad night (827) Order T-Shirt
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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.

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(717): Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl. http://tfl.nu/lse9

Replies (8) Good night (2057) Bad night (688) Order T-Shirt
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(919): View more from North Carolina

I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.

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(919): I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting. http://tfl.nu/i095

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.

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(814): I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before. http://tfl.nu/yjkb

Replies (2) Good night (982) Bad night (289)
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(856): View more from New Jersey

I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing

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(856): I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing http://tfl.nu/iy02

Replies (10) Good night (1083) Bad night (857)
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(813): View more from Florida

Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.

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(813): Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it. http://tfl.nu/c8t4

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(513): View more from Ohio

Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.

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(513): Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now. http://tfl.nu/fv9l

Replies (5) Good night (822) Bad night (381)
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(734): View more from Michigan

Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.

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(734): Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life. http://tfl.nu/3mco

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