girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
