Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
