It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize
