Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Randomize