there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
