is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
