i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
PANTIES FOUND
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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