Define "chronic" masturbator.
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
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