I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize
