AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize