Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Randomize
