We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
