Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Randomize
