Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
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