Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Randomize
