i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Blow job season was short but glorious.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Randomize
