If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
