Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
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