I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
