Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
