if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
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