we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
