I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Randomize