Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
Just took my morning after pill in the library
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Randomize
