Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
