We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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