That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Randomize
