Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
