I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
