Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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