i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Randomize
