physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
